Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Poor Grammar and Content: Now With Friends

Ingredients for this My Time: writing a blog that balances humor with pain, sarcasm with love, a past with a future, and hope with a martini.

Oh, Honey, I hear you. It irks you when someone doesn't edit for spelling and grammar. I mean, we live and love in a society for God's sake! And, worse, when someone puts inappropriate content on the internet, when they're trying to be a professional, like Ogden? (minute 1:36 is important.) How dare she? Who does she think she is, anonymous, another person, writing under a pseudonym? Doesn't she live in a society? Lordy. Yet...

Of course I'm not a pseudonym! It's me: Dagmar! Remember me? The little girl from a humble Tallina castle who was the umpire and commissioner of a sporting league that celebrated and defiled her own, and all, bodies?

Mmm, white wine in a box and a look of reverence, even in the rain! Looks like a healthy lass. And one that is appropriately covered, OK, in what seems to be an outdoor bathing vessel I've heard of called a "hot spring" which poor, leathah-y desert wanderers go to.

The thing is, Honey, that it's a wonder in this society that I can pry my lips off the pie pan or stop them from enclosing around little bitty pills like a fish to food long enough to write an ungrammatical, inappropriate mess. I mean, how can I live and love in this society when I know that I'M THE PROBLEM with it? I mean, I'm an amazing mess! Look at me! I'm incredible and terrible!

 So pat yourself on the back for being so good, such a good soldier and/or lover, and deal with this.

FYI: no one has actually said anything to lil' ol' Daggy about how her terrible grammar and content bother them. But, Honey, we know it's always safer in the upper echelons of society to frame everything--before anyone gets a chance to--as a kind of pre-apology.

Ha ha ha--that last one was sent to me as an "e-card" recently because I took in a lover named Daveed from the Cayman Islands. I thought he was Benecio Del Toro! My girlfriends laughed and laughed. I just LOVE my FRIENDS. Of which I HAVE SO MANY I'VE ALMOST MANIACALLY CAPITALIZED FRIENDSHIPS OF THE WORLD. Why? Because we're rich and amazing and gorgeous. They love you, they hate you, they are human, and so are you.

Like an Eastern European discotekka, sincerity and irony have merged in our world, and it's OK to start a project of testimony and art that has no clear outcome, nor a clear conscience. To support such ends (ha ha--I mean NO ENDS), Dagmar has asked some of her most sessy, fabulous, rich girlfriends to write about their My Times. Look for upcoming regular posts (and possibly nude photos!) by "Mommies' My Time," "The One-Percent's My Time" and "The Scholar's My Time" We're all so sorry for your loss, and we know you love to watch us turn ours into real wins. Let's all pretend not to know about each others' secrets and pains the next time we meet up, OK? Champers on me! Love, Daggy.

1 comment:

  1. This post is for my cousin, Svitlana, Queen of the Ukraine Discotekka